Roland Burris is a colossal d’bag

Burris has declared, despite facts to the contrary, “I’m a United States senator.”

He isn’t.

While Blagojevich has signed formal appointments papers, Jesse White, the Illinois secretary of state, has not, and Senate rules require that signature.

Burris, in turn, has gone to court hoping to win an order for White to sign the necessary paperwork, and has also threatened to sue to take his seat in the Senate.

“We are hoping and praying that they will not be able to deny what the Lord has ordained,” Burris said Sunday night.

You heard it, folks: The Lord has ordained that this man — who once called white opponents for the Democratic nomination for governor of Illinois “nonqualified white boys” (Apparently he hasn’t mastered the English language!); who helped to organize Chicago’s first Gun Turn-in Day, but opted to keep his own handgun, about which he claims to have forgotten; and responsible for the following

In 1985, Rolando Cruz was tried, convicted, and sentenced to death for kidnapping, rape, and murder along with a co-defendant in a DuPage County Circuit Court. In 1992, Assistant Attorney General Mary Brigid Kenney, whom Burris had assigned to fight Cruz’s appeal, sent Burris a memo identifying numerous errors in the investigation and trial in Cruz’s initial conviction. Burris ignored Kenney’s warnings, and she resigned in protest.

In September 1995, DNA tests showed that neither Cruz nor his co-defendant were the contributors of the semen found at the crime scene. On November 3, 1995, a DuPage County judge acquitted Cruz on the basis of recanted testimony, the DNA evidence, and the lack of any substantiated evidence against Cruz. He was fully pardoned by Governor George Ryan in 2002.

— The Lord has ordained that this man should serve in the United States Senate, for the great prophet Blagojevich has proclaimed it.

This would be funny were it not so sad, were it not so utterly unsurprising in contemporary America politics.

2 Responses

  1. it’s interesting how Blagojevich seems so unaffected by all the chaos swirling around him; it’s as if he feels right at home…

  2. The capital ‘L’ is assumed by whoever took that quote. Perhaps he just refers to Blago as “lord”.

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